**Self-reminder
Peiyi, it's time to get your ass back on track and work hard!
Stop slacking like a slob of fat on your bed everyday pressing your iphone,
start taking care of yourself and your room.
Remove makeup EVERY single day before you sleep, no matter how tired you are.
Start using all the masks/skincare products you spent so much money on.
Start controlling your diet.
Start exercising more.
Study harder!
Keep your clothes if you don't need them.
Stop shopping, take a look at your bursting wardrobe, clear those you know you will never wear again (always fail at this).
Start planning what you gonna wear the next day before you sleep and pack everything into your bag!
BLAH I just need to vent and remind myself to stop being such a fat lazy ass.
Boyfriend just commented yesterday that I am very 'lap sap' :(
I am starting to feel this way about myself too.
Need to work hard...
There's no ugly woman in this world, just lazy ones!
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Friday, November 9, 2012
Para Para Paradise
Nope when I say "Para Para Paradise", it's not part of the song by Coldplay-Paradise where the chorus goes 'Dreaming para-para-paradise~~"
I'm talking about the once-super-hot arcade game by Japan, Para Para Paradise!
Was at Marina Square with boyfriend a few days back when we headed down to their arcade to take a look, we were looking for any shooting games that we know how to play. But when we reached there, I found SO many games that I used to play when I was between Pri 6-Sec2, those days where I would spend ALL my money on them and even stole my mom's :X
They had Puzzle Fighter, Street Fighter (those first version kind I think), King Of Fighter 97', King of Fighter 02' and all the games I played during those days, and that was around 10 years ago! My goodness I feel like damn old. Will upload the pics of those games next time :D
Anyway we also saw the ParaParaParadise! They had the Japan version, which is those eurobeat songs, and even Korean ones where they had H.O.T and S.E.S' songs! The korean ones are damn hard to find in Singapore last time and I always go to the Funland in Clementi (became City Vibe now) and there's always a lot of youngsters who dance really nicely (that time) like street-dancing kind, instead of following the choreograph.
It was cool during those days but that day there was a guy (with those kind of bleached hair I see 10 years ago) dancing to it and he was dancing the 'street-dance' kind people use to dance 10 years ago!
It was so damn cool last time, but I couldn't help it and laughed at him for looking so silly and old-fashioned now :p
It was SO damn popular when I was Primary 6 - Secondary 2, that people would actually queue up in front of the machine to wait for their turn to put the token into the machine and showcase their dance. My primary school friend even danced this during Teacher's day celebration, everyone thought it was JUST SO COOL.
And of course, they start merchandising and came up with VCDs (DVDs very expensive that time), where a few Gyarus will stand on screen and when the music plays they start waving their hands around, like they are playing at the machine.
So I managed to convince my dad to buy one VCD for me. And being a shy girl I am, I never danced the choreographed one in arcade but just do it at home. I would play the VCD and dance all the songs that were inside, following the Gyarus. And I would sweat like a pig! Really good exercise, like aerobics I would say :D My mom even said I lost weight when I danced to that VCD everyday during the period of time, but gained it back after I stopped zzz.
Sadly, when I moved house 2 years ago, I threw the VCD away, thinking I won't need it anymore (I lost weight that time by eating Meal replacement), but I regret now cause I'm into exercising and thought this would be a great disc for me to workout at home when it's too late to jog outside! Also to reminisce all the memories I had when I was a teen...
Only manage to find this video (mirrored version some more -__-) on Youtube, quality sucks but listening and watching them dance just make me cringe and smile at the same time :D
My favorite is always the "Velfare 2000"!
Till then! Back to work :D
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
What have I done? Nothing.
Went drinking with girlfriends, 1 shot + 1 vodka with orange juice, and you think I did something shameful behind you, what if I were to do it to you? If you were to go Thai Pub that night I could have well accused you of hugging or kissing the Thai girls there, and there is so much dirtier, I did not accuse because I trusted you.
You? Just a text from a friend who joked that I should stay with her brother, make you think I have something with him.
I did not delete his messages, never before. You said conversations were gone because my phone got rebooted due to the Find my iPhone app. But you said I purposely delete them.
You asked for explanations, I gave, But what did I get in return?
"You know what you did"
what did i do? drink with girlfriends, after that friend's brother came, friend's brother drove us to Zouk, Zouk full house, so we went to eat Yong Tau Foo at Redhill. Then CoffeeBean at Holland. Then both friend and bro sent me home.
I just hope someone can add in something in between that could happen to me and her brother so that I would not feel that I've been accused so horribly.
I have never done anything shameful, never betrayed you.
But because of your insecurities you label me as a whore or a slut.
If this makes you feel better for breaking up with me, lying to yourself that you dated a whore and you finally want to get rid of her, if by labeling me as this, makes you better. Just go ahead.
I will be pushed to the ground for now, but I promise I will stand up on my feet again and tell myself you're not worth it.
Went drinking with girlfriends, 1 shot + 1 vodka with orange juice, and you think I did something shameful behind you, what if I were to do it to you? If you were to go Thai Pub that night I could have well accused you of hugging or kissing the Thai girls there, and there is so much dirtier, I did not accuse because I trusted you.
You? Just a text from a friend who joked that I should stay with her brother, make you think I have something with him.
I did not delete his messages, never before. You said conversations were gone because my phone got rebooted due to the Find my iPhone app. But you said I purposely delete them.
You asked for explanations, I gave, But what did I get in return?
"You know what you did"
what did i do? drink with girlfriends, after that friend's brother came, friend's brother drove us to Zouk, Zouk full house, so we went to eat Yong Tau Foo at Redhill. Then CoffeeBean at Holland. Then both friend and bro sent me home.
I just hope someone can add in something in between that could happen to me and her brother so that I would not feel that I've been accused so horribly.
I have never done anything shameful, never betrayed you.
But because of your insecurities you label me as a whore or a slut.
If this makes you feel better for breaking up with me, lying to yourself that you dated a whore and you finally want to get rid of her, if by labeling me as this, makes you better. Just go ahead.
I will be pushed to the ground for now, but I promise I will stand up on my feet again and tell myself you're not worth it.
When there's life, there's always death.
Yeap as the title says it all, when there's life, there's always death.
Do you know?
Every second in this world a baby is born, where people rejoice and gather to welcome the new life.
On the other hand,
every second, someone dies, where people mourn and for some, gather to send them off on a journey to the other world.
A relationship between a couple also, sad to say, has 2 different endings too.
It's always either they get married or they end it.
Just yesterday, a friend of his just proposed to his girlfriend and of course she said "I do" because according to him they were a really sweet couple even though they've been together for almost 2 years.
That's not the main point anyway.
So, like I say, every single second there's someone getting married, and definitely someone breaking up.
I don't have to say more, I'm on the other side of the world.
Yes I'm happy they are getting married as I wait for my turn, but God sure knows how to play game with my life.
I was proposed,
but to a breakup.
Would I say I'm heartbroken? I don't know, I feel crushed actually, and numb, like this is the Nth time I'm treated this way and by default by now I should be used to it, this is the feeling I'm having
Am I suppose to cry? Like how I always do when I'm ditched? I don't know. Tears roll down but I managed to stop myself from wailing.
Everything was alright, I had a bad headache and he accompanied me throughout the night till the next morning. As usual I went to shower, but when I came out of the bathroom I was greeted with questions bombarding me asking if I had an affair or did I do something behind him.
As usual we argued and of course I did not do anything that betrayed him, just when I thought we were gonna have another fight over issues with his insecurities,
I saw a bag packed with full of his personal belongings.
That's when I stopped arguing and I know he's leaving.
Why? You may ask why do I think so just because of a bag full of his stuffs, maybe he just need to use them?
But no, because the past few days after we made up after a HUGE fight, he's not been himself and I know he has not been happy.
So today morning, I know he had crossed the line, he decide to end it.
This is not the first time I experience this in a relationship. There was this guy who obviously showed to me he was unhappy with our relationship but we kept going on even though I could feel his changes. And all he need is just ONE thing, for him to snap, and allow him to let go.
He wanted to end it long ago, because he's not happy but he could not find a reason (or excuse?) to let go, so all he needs, is a reason, in fact ANY reason, for him to use, so it allows him to let go without feeling so much of a guilt.
I guess being in and out of love SO many times did help me manage my life in some ways.
It helped me to accept any breakups and not feel like my world is crashing.
Just needed a space to rant.
How am I feeling?? Numb, crushed, and just... numb.
It's like telling myself "Oh well Peiyi, this is not your first time, in fact this is your Nth time, just get use to it, it'll be over and you'll feel normal again"
Yeah that's what I say to myself so I will not do stupid stuff after a breakup every time.
There's no need to argue who's right and who's wrong, when it ends, there's no use pointing fingers.
Love is just like a gamble, you put in all, you have a 50-50 of losing everything,
that's why Mom always tell me not to put in ALL my feelings because when you lose it, you have nothing left.
At first I listened to her, put in bit by bit, and when I thought I could finally put in ALL of it,
I just have to lose it.
Suck it up bitch,
Life sucks, isn't it?
Winner takes it all, loser standing small.
I've lost, because I risked and put in my ALL, time to admit defeat.
Till then.
Do you know?
Every second in this world a baby is born, where people rejoice and gather to welcome the new life.
On the other hand,
every second, someone dies, where people mourn and for some, gather to send them off on a journey to the other world.
A relationship between a couple also, sad to say, has 2 different endings too.
It's always either they get married or they end it.
Just yesterday, a friend of his just proposed to his girlfriend and of course she said "I do" because according to him they were a really sweet couple even though they've been together for almost 2 years.
That's not the main point anyway.
So, like I say, every single second there's someone getting married, and definitely someone breaking up.
I don't have to say more, I'm on the other side of the world.
Yes I'm happy they are getting married as I wait for my turn, but God sure knows how to play game with my life.
I was proposed,
but to a breakup.
Would I say I'm heartbroken? I don't know, I feel crushed actually, and numb, like this is the Nth time I'm treated this way and by default by now I should be used to it, this is the feeling I'm having
Am I suppose to cry? Like how I always do when I'm ditched? I don't know. Tears roll down but I managed to stop myself from wailing.
Everything was alright, I had a bad headache and he accompanied me throughout the night till the next morning. As usual I went to shower, but when I came out of the bathroom I was greeted with questions bombarding me asking if I had an affair or did I do something behind him.
As usual we argued and of course I did not do anything that betrayed him, just when I thought we were gonna have another fight over issues with his insecurities,
I saw a bag packed with full of his personal belongings.
That's when I stopped arguing and I know he's leaving.
Why? You may ask why do I think so just because of a bag full of his stuffs, maybe he just need to use them?
But no, because the past few days after we made up after a HUGE fight, he's not been himself and I know he has not been happy.
So today morning, I know he had crossed the line, he decide to end it.
This is not the first time I experience this in a relationship. There was this guy who obviously showed to me he was unhappy with our relationship but we kept going on even though I could feel his changes. And all he need is just ONE thing, for him to snap, and allow him to let go.
He wanted to end it long ago, because he's not happy but he could not find a reason (or excuse?) to let go, so all he needs, is a reason, in fact ANY reason, for him to use, so it allows him to let go without feeling so much of a guilt.
I guess being in and out of love SO many times did help me manage my life in some ways.
It helped me to accept any breakups and not feel like my world is crashing.
Just needed a space to rant.
How am I feeling?? Numb, crushed, and just... numb.
It's like telling myself "Oh well Peiyi, this is not your first time, in fact this is your Nth time, just get use to it, it'll be over and you'll feel normal again"
Yeah that's what I say to myself so I will not do stupid stuff after a breakup every time.
There's no need to argue who's right and who's wrong, when it ends, there's no use pointing fingers.
Love is just like a gamble, you put in all, you have a 50-50 of losing everything,
that's why Mom always tell me not to put in ALL my feelings because when you lose it, you have nothing left.
At first I listened to her, put in bit by bit, and when I thought I could finally put in ALL of it,
I just have to lose it.
Suck it up bitch,
Life sucks, isn't it?
Winner takes it all, loser standing small.
I've lost, because I risked and put in my ALL, time to admit defeat.
Till then.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Randoms
Quite free in office today, and I have a SD card in here so I thought I could blog abit of photos here which summed up my life LOL.
Looking back at all the photos, I realized I really put on a lot of weight ever since I got into a relationship.
Before I was attached, my life was just studies, work and exercise. I run almost everyday, had kickboxing and just ate normal food you get at kopitiams.
And now, what do couples do when they go on dates? Yes, FOOOOOOD!
Eat nonstop. Other than movies, what else can we do. Eat lo. Sometimes go LAN shop play Left4Dead -_-.
So I'm ballooning now, same goes for my boyfriend.
My exercise continues, I've even added swimming into my routine. I swim 1-2 times a week, kickboxing once a week, and try to go for jogs 2 times a week.
But we all know it's really my diet I need to control, if not no matter how intense my workouts are, I'll never slim down.
I gained 4kg ever since we got together!
Please let me lose weight :x
Is swimming bad for me? My calves seems to be getting bigger and bigger :O
My life has been in a mess.
I failed my ACCA exams, and I haven't study for my retakes which is coming in December and it's already October!
OH GOSH I need to wake up.
Other than my diet getting out of control, my bank has been depleting like mad.
I've been shopping online NONSTOP. Can spend up to $600 a month just on online shopping.
Online shoppings + Good food on dates = Bankruptcy.
So I'm quite broke now, I even had to use my savings money!
When I started working, my pay was much lower but I was able to save!
Now, I have to use them even though I earn much more now. What the?
I have been controlling myself these days, not to get impulse buys.
Improved a lot but Philana was saying I shouldn't be buying at all anymore.
Hmmm.... :(
Just hoping my life could get back on track now.
Anyway I've posted random photos. HAHA bye.
TimYee's 21st birthday last year, this was one of my slimmer times :(
Cuzzie birthday!
Darius sitting on my previous workplace's chair! I miss everyone at SABE a lot :(
Scrapbook made by SABE team (led by Felicia LOLOLOL) on my last day of work. And a old SECA bear given by one colleague from the other department, it's an old bear, it was there ever since I was an intern there.
Contents inside made me cried. It was really hard to control and very very emotional. My 2 years there were good, and bad.
Saying goodbye to the workshop where I had my lunch (sometimes), my afternoon naps, my cuts and blood, and many memories I had............. I even dig someone's ears here. It was really full of memories.
My best buddy! Always there for me. Never left me out. Seen me cried my eyeballs out when I was ditched and was there for me every time. Just sitting beside me quietly when I was so down. Saw how pathetic I was that time and just grabbed me and told me "Look at yourself, do you even look human?" LOL. Bring me for good food when we are out for work at hospitals. Make me laugh and just spice up my working life.
Our first date at USS. We were so happy and tired that day. Boyfriend, why you look so Ahbeng? :(
Phil's 23rd birthday (OMG WE ARE SO OLD NOW) at Brussel Sprouts
Yiru's 23rd birthday at Bishan Prawning farm. Those prawns were not ours, it was some uncle who caught a lot and gave to us. And we act like is ours HAHAHA
Boyfriend and I at St James boiler (?) Had free Greygoose Magnum so we went for free drinks.
Even had free fries cause Eve worked there HAHAHA end up paid for cab home only :D
SEE, I'm so much fatter now OH GOSH
Ahwei's 20th birthday at Novena :D Baskin Robbins ice-cream cake!
LOL crying photo at SABE again
Monday, August 13, 2012
Camwhore
Don't want my blog to rot, so I'm adding photos of myself here while in office using their webcam.
WAHAHAH!!!!!
I've been having my braces on for 1 year now. Another 10 more months and it's gonna be gone.
So take more pics with my braces in case I miss them the next time, which most probably wouldn't happen.
Anyway I really wish I could blog again like how I use to in the past. But as we grow older, there's more commitments and time is something that is so precious and difficult to grasp.
Maybe I should really start blogging more, because when I grow older next time I can look back on my posts and remember my life as it was.
Waiting for boyfriend to come pick me from work.
So I'm blogging here!
Okay time to go, need to finish some loose works before I leave office,
blog again.
BYE!
Friday, June 15, 2012
Cherry
Dear Angel....
4.17am now, and I was scrolling through my photo folder and saw our photos.
I miss you very much.
Your laughters, your voice and your smile,
still etched in my heart till today.
Never forgotten,
you will never be forgotten..
x
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