Thank you

I am a pretty reserved person when it comes to thanking someone, I don't know how to express enough how much I am thankful for what he/she did.

So just let me write this post, though I know he won't read it.

Thank you,

for the company today.

Knowing I was really down and needed a person to talk to, even though you're so busy and tired from your work and business and everything.

For watching 'Internship' with me when you've already watched it (and only telling me after the show ended).

For making me comfortable with telling you my secrets and I know it's safe with you.

For leaving work early and rushing down just to catch the 7pm show, cause I don't wanna catch the show at 8.40.

For listening attentively to my rantings and giving me solutions, encouraging me and motivate me, helping me climb out of that dark pit I was in for the past 2 days, wallowing in self pity. Thank you for pulling me out.

You can be a real mean bitch sometimes but you are truthful and you showed me you cared.

I really don't know how to show my gratitude to you. The most I can do, is to be there for you if you ever needed me, ever. 

Thank you, for everything.

Glad we met and I really didn't expect a friendship to come out from this, considering how we met each other.

I am sure God made me meet you, for a reason, and this is the reason.

Thank you my friend :)

*hugs*

Xiaobai's 23rd birthday + the 1st Butter Factory trip which....

I've decided to be hardworking and get my ass to blogging again!

There was a period of time I just thought anyway the photos are in Facebook, I upload them and tag my friends and vice versa, so why bother to blog?

But as time goes by, I realise it's so much better to be reading the past posts and read about my feelings at that point of time, rather than just scrolling through back-dated photos on Facebook, which lags like hell as the photos get older, maybe is just my com's problems.. But whatever...

:)

So from today on, there'll be random posts (with pictures) which occurred super long ago, I'll still update them.

For example, my Batam trip and Perhantian trip :D

And other whatnots... 

I finally found the right reason to want to blog, after reading my old blog and had a great time, so here we go!

Xiaobai's 23rd birthday @ Plaza Sing's Swensens

Planned a little surprise by showing up at the restaurant before she entered with her ITE friends.

But she kind of already expected it.... Cause she saw Xingua at the MRT station. LOL.

As usual, crap and made fun of each other like nobody's business. :/

My dear new M.A.C blusher I bought for only 1 week, which I murdered by dropping it on the floor.

Heart broke like how it did. But luckily Phil was in Taiwan so I got her to buy one new one for me from DFS. Maybe I don't have fate with their blusher. The first one I bought, I lost it in a cab, and this one broke after 1 week! But I really loved it :(

This girl damn idiot. I had a flower pin on my hair that day and she kept saying I was HIAO. So when I wanted to take photo, she keep asking me to do this pose with her. I did, unwillingly. And Wahlao look so fat in this photo LOL

Still trying to irritate me. But I shall ignore and give a sweet smile :)

See how much we love you!

Pardon my weird fingers. I was aiming the cream on his face, really.

My little boyfriend! He's always so shy with us especially when us girls (especially me) try to snatch him away from one another.

He's so cute with his dimples, he dances, he can sing, he's ultra nice, super good boy.

But too young for me :(

Wo shi lao jie jie (T_T)

Tried showing some love.

Shorty birthday girl and I <3

Group pic yo!

Then... I proceeded to meet Yiru, Eve and Tiffany at Raffles Place and headed down to Butter Factory.
It was Eve's first time to Butter!
And also the clubbing session with them after 6 months of not stepping into a club.
Was restricted real badly by the previous relationship I had.
The last time I went to a club was at Zouk with Yiru, Eve and the ex, which was no fun and didn't end happily because of a guy having some petty issues. PFFT.

Only 2 photos that day.
After that session, it lead to another 2 more in the next 2 weeks...
Bad for health. So we stopped. More on that next time ;)

According to my dear friends, they said I am a real fun person when I'm high from alcohol.

I smile alot, I am much more gentle, I am cuter, I am much more friendly.

Mom saw me got home still kind of high the other day and she was all smiling when she described how I behaved when I was drunk..

And Jayius says my eyes can 'electrocute' people when I'm drunk, but when I'm not, I am just any girl on the street :(

GOT SO BAD OR NOT :(

So I have to be drunk 24/7.......

Okay that's all for this post.

More up next!

Last Kiss

I still remember the look on your face
Lit through the darkness at 1:58
The words that you whispered for just us to know
You told me you loved me so why did you go away, go away

I do recall now the smell of the rain
Fresh on the pavement, I ran off the plane
That July 9th the beat of your heart
It jumps through your shirt, I can still feel your arms
But now I'll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
How to be something you miss
Never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips

I do remember the swing of your step
The life of the party, you're showing off again
And I roll my eyes and then you pulled me in
I'm not much for dancing but for you I did
Because I loved your handshake, meeting my father
I love how you walk with your hands in your pockets
How you'd kiss me when I was in the middle of saying something
There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions

And I'll go, sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
How to be something you miss
Never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips, ohh

So I'll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep
And I'll feel you forget me like I use to feel you breathe
And I'll keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are
Hope it's nice where you are
And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day
And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed
We can plan for a change in weather and time
I never planned on you changing your mind

So, I'll go, sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
How to be something you miss
I never thought we'd have our last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips
Just like our last kiss, forever the name on my lips
Forever the name on my lips, just like our last.

Was reading a blog and this girl had this sentence in her Title post
"You told me you love me, but why did you go away?"

And found it SO familiar. Then I realized it's from this song by Taylor Swift.
I used to listen to it every time when I think of Chihkye.
That's why the lyrics are all stuck in my head.

The song's a heartbreaking one.
Just like how he broke mine.

But it's all in the past now.

I hope it's normal of me to still think of how he broke my heart after 2+ years (very bad with counting days now so was it 2 years plus or no?).

It was a great lesson learnt.
And it changed me to be who I am today.

All my friends and family said I've changed so much after he left me.
I hope it's for the better, though I know some people thought it as a change for the worst.
Let's just say I've grown up.

Life goes on. We fall, pick ourselves up and move on.
The world doesn't stop revolving and changing just cause of how shit you get hit.
Just have to go with the flow...

Ahhhh why such an emo post.
My life is suppose to be awesome right now!

Better blog update the next time.

Byez.

Note: Not loving/missing/thinking about Chihkye. It's the pain he left on me and the scar that will always remind me of what I need to remember. It will not go away.

Hey you.

All the best in your new relationship and I believe she is much more better for you.

;)

& drinking and too many late nights out at Thai pubs ain't good for the body.

Whatever it is. 

I hope your life is better without me.

I hope, you will start having plans for your future, even without me 'pushing' you anymore.

I've been wanting to talk to you but I guess you really hate me to the core. So if you still read my blog, I hope you are doing good.

Don't disappoint your parents.

Peace out.

Whats up

Xiaobai LOVE sent this to me! I miss you!! *Many many love*

Actually I've drafted a long-ass blog post regarding my weight loss journey.. But after some consideration, I decide to leave it there first and not publish it, reasons being:

1. I need more photos from my hard disk! Hardly uses my computer at home anymore.
2. I feel I have more work to do for my body, I'm far far far away from what I want to achieve
3. I've decided to take up a new challenge for myself!

So ya...

My life has been as simple as it could be.
Nothing drama-mama happening, having family times, spending time with friends, and working out.
And also meeting new people :)

Am still waiting for the nerve-wrecking results to be out, then I'll be putting my ass back into studying until late nights after work.
Wonder how would that affect my workouts since I am working out *almost* everyday now. Need to come up with new plans!

Talking about workouts, I've learnt that I am not stretching enough. So hopefully I would be able to be disciplined and incorporate simple stretches into my routine (or before I sleep every night), to stretch my bulky legs :/

It's gonna be a long long weekend! From Thursday to Sunday yo!
Wednesdays, Thursdays already booked with events with friends Imma so excited!
Can't wait to see my Bitches after so long and we're having steamboat at Winson's place!
Not sure what to do with my Friday-Sunday.
Hope to use this weekend and meetup with friends I haven't been seeing in awhile.

Or maybe I should REALLY do a spring cleaning for my room.. It's really getting-out-of-hand.
:(


Oh yeah my leg got burnt by the motor exhaust 2 days ago.. Hurting so bad and it's still oozing out yellowish liquid. Mommy say it might leave a scar!!!!!!!!!!
Haiz. I'm just, stupid/blur/careless beyond words.


Okay nothing much to update.
Ending with a fatty picture of me on my blue Friday in my panda tank. HAHA :D

Dig Deeper

I NEED NEW EXERCISE SHORTS DAMN IT.

 Look like an insane woman after Insanity. It's so hard to push that play button everytime, but am always glad and proud of myself after completing it and sweating it out. Thus a photo everytime to motivate myself so whenever I don't feel like working out I'll just look at them.

But I totally believe right now, exercise is not a problem for me. I've been through the 'Really don't feel like doing it' phase and now I have a big hurdle to cross - Diet.

Got to stop looking at potato chips during movies, stop reaching out for that digestive biscuits in the office, stop myself from ordering Sodas and get only Oolong teas if I want a cold drink in the coffeeshop. Stop eating a whole plate of rice/noodle/pasta. Stop putting so much Peanut butter and Jam on my wholemeal bread. Start loving Greek Yogurt and Oats. Start loving all the funny greens.

Start loving squats too.
In the past I really really hate them. Squats are tiring, they are sore. And if done incorrectly, they hurt my back. But I've been reading articles and listening for advices, and I conclude that squats will help me cut my legs abit better, and I will not BULK up like a man.

Start loving weights!
After being through so many cardio workouts - Running, Swimming, Cardio kickboxing, and of course, Insanity. I have to admit my tummy/waist had lost quite abit of inches and I'm seeing faint abs lines when I flex it (though still covered by a lump of fat which jumps when I jog), but my triceps are still so flimsy. I do have abit of biceps showing but the triceps is making my arms looking fat. So I think I'm going to get some small dumbbells and do more triceps exercise!

I'm a lazy person and I am very systematic. I need to come up with a plan (Reps and Sets) so I can follow through. If not I'll just maybe do like 5 reps for each set and only 1 set for the day LOL.

Time to research and dig deeper (Slogan from Insanity LOL), I've seen results but I need to push harder and find new routines because I'm at the plateau already.

I'm thinking of Gym, but I need a gym buddy! :(

Thank you Xiaobai for sending me this - Need it more than anything.

I love my Mom, Bro and friends :)

It's okay for you to delete me from Facebook and Twitter. You're not the first one anyway. This just proved how a person handle situations differently.

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

Was surfing and chanced upon this article.

I need this, so I'm letting it stay on this blog :)

**Ones in red are realllllly what I need now. So.. yeap...

From: http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/12/11/30-things-to-stop-doing-to-yourself/

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  Nothing could be closer to the truth.  But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on.  No, it won’t be easy.  There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself.  Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.  Yes, help others; but help yourself too.  If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing.  Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success.  You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us.  We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.  Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive.  But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either.  You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.  
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place.  Evaluate situations and take decisive action.  You cannot change what you refuse to confront.  Making progress involves risk.  Period!  You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely.  It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.  There’s no need to rush.  If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.  Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.  But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.  Concentrate on beating your own records every day.  Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.  Ask yourself this:  “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you.  You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough.  But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past.  You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation.  So smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart.  You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!  And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too.  If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway.  Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.  The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.  
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Don’t take the easy way out.  Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well.  You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out.  But making one person smile CAN change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy.  One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time?  Three years?  Five years?”  If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.