I won't lie and act tough because I really can't do it now.
I will learn to accept.
Disappointments
Sadness
Regrets
Rejections
Things that will never be mine no matter how hard I work for it just because this is how the world works.
I will look at the stewardesses, Changi airport, Singapore Airlines and accept that I'll never be like them.
I won't deny it affects me so bad when I see photos of the girls I met going for trainings and having so much fun.
I will learn to accept.
But not now.
Then again,
not now, then when?
Side note:
Post op week 4. Getting back to working out slowly, my body is not as strong as before.
Because I haven't work out for too long? Or because my body is still trying to recover?
But I'll take one step at a time. Wound is closed but still hurts when I stretch too far.
My doctor asked me to take the painkiller and just stretch, if not my muscles will be stiff.
Like seriously? He said it won't tear but it's my body I guess I know it better than him.
Now I have to make another major choice, again.
Mom was pissed at doctor for not removing the whole thyroid in the first place because she saw how I suffered post-op (cause I am weak la I know) and how it got her worried so bad.
But doctors just said they were hoping the lymph nodes were not affected when they remove the first half.
If my lymph nodes are clear, that means I'm totally safe, it's stage 1 and I'm cleared from cancer!
Which meant I still have a glimpse of hope of handing in a good medical report to the SIA doctor and get the job.
Luck is not on my side.
This is just not for me.
I have to be positive.
Turning 25 this year, life has so much to offer.
I promise to improve myself this year and get rid of all my bad habits,
which include being late (LOL I bet whoever is reading now will nod your head incessantly), and using too much social media and watching too much tv.
Okay goodbye.
Btw, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
From now on, no more sad sad posts.
I want to be happy
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