There's no ugly women, just lazy ones

This photo was taken in October 2011, when I was around my slimmest.

I was 54kg, I lost 6kg from 60 to 54kg in 5 months at that time because I started jogging and was watching my diet.

 

But now, I'm back to 60kg, near 61kg.

Maybe it's the muscle gained from all the swimming, jogging and kickboxing, but can't be 7kgs right?!

 

I really need to work hard from now on.
I gained so much weight I look so horrible.

I can see the cheeks from my sight when I smile, my face got rounder, my shorts got tighter and I start feeling restless.

Nope I'm not sensitive or anything, I know it's the truth.

I've been trying to lose weight since I was 15, it's been 8 years. Got a little bit of
results last year and I slacked, now I got it all back.

Jiayou peiyi you can do it!

70% diet, 30% exercise.

I really need to watch my diet,
and start planning for new exercise routines when time and weather doesn't allow me to jog or swim.

Insanity? I just did the Fit Test last night and I'm having muscle sores now. It is so scary, I was so giddy and tired I lost my appetite all the way till next day until I had some food in my mouth :s

Wanted to follow the schedule they give but I guess it's impossible. Shall slowly work my way up.

Hope to have good updates when I have the time to blog next time

Breakfast

Thank you boyfriend, for making breakfast the night before every time for me to bring to work the next day even though you're already super tired.
Your efforts are not unappreciated.
I guess no one love me more than you do :) (other than my parents! Heh)

No pain no gain

**Self-reminder

Peiyi, it's time to get your ass back on track and work hard!
Stop slacking like a slob of fat on your bed everyday pressing your iphone,
start taking care of yourself and your room.

Remove makeup EVERY single day before you sleep, no matter how tired you are.
Start using all the masks/skincare products you spent so much money on.
Start controlling your diet.
Start exercising more.
Study harder!
Keep your clothes if you don't need them.

Stop shopping, take a look at your bursting wardrobe, clear those you know you will never wear again (always fail at this).

Start planning what you gonna wear the next day before you sleep and pack everything into your bag!

BLAH I just need to vent and remind myself to stop being such a fat lazy ass.
Boyfriend just commented yesterday that I am very 'lap sap' :(
I am starting to feel this way about myself too.

Need to work hard...

There's no ugly woman in this world, just lazy ones!

Para Para Paradise

Nope when I say "Para Para Paradise", it's not part of the song by Coldplay-Paradise where the chorus goes 'Dreaming para-para-paradise~~"
I'm talking about the once-super-hot arcade game by Japan, Para Para Paradise!

Was at Marina Square with boyfriend a few days back when we headed down to their arcade to take a look, we were looking for any shooting games that we know how to play. But when we reached there, I found SO many games that I used to play when I was between Pri 6-Sec2, those days where I would spend ALL my money on them and even stole my mom's :X

They had Puzzle Fighter, Street Fighter (those first version kind I think), King Of Fighter 97', King of Fighter 02' and all the games I played during those days, and that was around 10 years ago! My goodness I feel like damn old. Will upload the pics of those games next time :D

Anyway we also saw the ParaParaParadise! They had the Japan version, which is those eurobeat songs, and even Korean ones where they had H.O.T and S.E.S' songs! The korean ones are damn hard to find in Singapore last time and I always go to the Funland in Clementi (became City Vibe now) and there's always a lot of youngsters who dance really nicely (that time) like street-dancing kind, instead of following the choreograph.
It was cool during those days but that day there was a guy (with those kind of bleached hair I see 10 years ago) dancing to it and he was dancing the 'street-dance' kind people use to dance 10 years ago!
It was so damn cool last time, but I couldn't help it and laughed at him for looking so silly and old-fashioned now :p

It was SO damn popular when I was Primary 6 - Secondary 2, that people would actually queue up in front of the machine to wait for their turn to put the token into the machine and showcase their dance. My primary school friend even danced this during Teacher's day celebration, everyone thought it was JUST SO COOL.
And of course, they start merchandising and came up with VCDs (DVDs very expensive that time), where a few Gyarus will stand on screen and when the music plays they start waving their hands around, like they are playing at the machine.

So I managed to convince my dad to buy one VCD for me. And being a shy girl I am, I never danced the choreographed one in arcade but just do it at home. I would play the VCD and dance all the songs that were inside, following the Gyarus. And I would sweat like a pig! Really good exercise, like aerobics I would say :D My mom even said I lost weight when I danced to that VCD everyday during the period of time, but gained it back after I stopped zzz.

Sadly, when I moved house 2 years ago, I threw the VCD away, thinking I won't need it anymore (I lost weight that time by eating Meal replacement), but I regret now cause I'm into exercising and thought this would be a great disc for me to workout at home when it's too late to jog outside! Also to reminisce all the memories I had when I was a teen...

Only manage to find this video (mirrored version some more -__-) on Youtube, quality sucks but listening and watching them dance just make me cringe and smile at the same time :D

My favorite is always the "Velfare 2000"!

Till then! Back to work :D

What have I done? Nothing.

Went drinking with girlfriends, 1 shot + 1 vodka with orange juice, and you think I did something shameful behind you, what if I were to do it to you? If you were to go Thai Pub that night I could have well accused you of hugging or kissing the Thai girls there, and there is so much dirtier, I did not accuse because I trusted you.
You? Just a text from a friend who joked that I should stay with her brother, make you think I have something with him.
I did not delete his messages, never before. You said conversations were gone because my phone got rebooted due to the Find my iPhone app. But you said I purposely delete them.

You asked for explanations, I gave, But what did I get in return?
"You know what you did"

what did i do? drink with girlfriends, after that friend's brother came, friend's brother drove us to Zouk, Zouk full house, so we went to eat Yong Tau Foo at Redhill. Then CoffeeBean at Holland. Then both friend and bro sent me home.
I just hope someone can add in something in between that could happen to me and her brother so that I would not feel that I've been accused so horribly.

I have never done anything shameful, never betrayed you.
But because of your insecurities you label me as a whore or a slut.
If this makes you feel better for breaking up with me, lying to yourself that you dated a whore and you finally want to get rid of her, if by labeling me as this, makes you better. Just go ahead.

I will be pushed to the ground for now, but I promise I will stand up on my feet again and tell myself you're not worth it.

When there's life, there's always death.

Yeap as the title says it all, when there's life, there's always death.
Do you know?
Every second in this world a baby is born, where people rejoice and gather to welcome the new life.
On the other hand,
every second, someone dies, where people mourn and for some, gather to send them off on a journey to the other world.

A relationship between a couple also, sad to say, has 2 different endings too.
It's always either they get married or they end it.

Just yesterday, a friend of his just proposed to his girlfriend and of course she said "I do" because according to him they were a really sweet couple even though they've been together for almost 2 years.
That's not the main point anyway.

So, like I say, every single second there's someone getting married, and definitely someone breaking up.

I don't have to say more, I'm on the other side of the world.
Yes I'm happy they are getting married as I wait for my turn, but God sure knows how to play game with my life.
I was proposed,
but to a breakup.

Would I say I'm heartbroken? I don't know, I feel crushed actually, and numb, like this is the Nth time I'm treated this way and by default by now I should be used to it, this is the feeling I'm having

Am I suppose to cry? Like how I always do when I'm ditched? I don't know. Tears roll down but I managed to stop myself from wailing.

Everything was alright, I had a bad headache and he accompanied me throughout the night till the next morning. As usual I went to shower, but when I came out of the bathroom I was greeted with questions bombarding me asking if I had an affair or did I do something behind him.
As usual we argued and of course I did not do anything that betrayed him, just when I thought we were gonna have another fight over issues with his insecurities,

I saw a bag packed with full of his personal belongings.

That's when I stopped arguing and I know he's leaving.
Why? You may ask why do I think so just because of a bag full of his stuffs, maybe he just need to use them?
But no, because the past few days after we made up after a HUGE fight, he's not been himself and I know he has not been happy.
So today morning, I know he had crossed the line, he decide to end it.


This is not the first time I experience this in a  relationship. There was this guy who obviously showed to me he was unhappy with our relationship but we kept going on even though I could feel his changes. And all he need is just ONE thing, for him to snap, and allow him to let go.

He wanted to end it long ago, because he's not happy but he could not find a reason (or excuse?) to let go, so all he needs, is a reason, in fact ANY reason, for him to use, so it allows him to let go without feeling so much of a guilt.

I guess being in and out of love SO many times did help me manage my life in some ways.
It helped me to accept any breakups and not feel like my world is crashing.

Just needed a space to rant.

How am I feeling?? Numb, crushed, and just... numb.

It's like telling myself "Oh well Peiyi, this is not your first time, in fact this is your Nth time, just get use to it, it'll be over and you'll feel normal again"

Yeah that's what I say to myself so I will not do stupid stuff after a breakup every time.

There's no need to argue who's right and who's wrong, when it ends, there's no use pointing fingers.

Love is just like a gamble, you put in all, you have a 50-50 of losing everything,
that's why Mom always tell me not to put in ALL my feelings because when you lose it, you have nothing left.
At first I listened to her, put in bit by bit, and when I thought I could finally put in ALL of it,
I just have to lose it.

Suck it up bitch,
Life sucks, isn't it?

Winner takes it all, loser standing small.
I've lost, because I risked and put in my ALL, time to admit defeat.

Till then.

Randoms

Quite free in office today, and I have a SD card in here so I thought I could blog abit of photos here which summed up my life LOL.

Looking back at all the photos, I realized I really put on a lot of weight ever since I got into a relationship.

Before I was attached, my life was just studies, work and exercise. I run almost everyday, had kickboxing and just ate normal food you get at kopitiams.

And now, what do couples do when they go on dates? Yes, FOOOOOOD!

Eat nonstop. Other than movies, what else can we do. Eat lo. Sometimes go LAN shop play Left4Dead -_-.

So I'm ballooning now, same goes for my boyfriend.

My exercise continues, I've even added swimming into my routine. I swim 1-2 times a week, kickboxing once a week, and try to go for jogs 2 times a week.

But we all know it's really my diet I need to control, if not no matter how intense my workouts are, I'll never slim down.

I gained 4kg ever since we got together!

Please let me lose weight :x

Is swimming bad for me? My calves seems to be getting bigger and bigger :O 

My life has been in a mess.

I failed my ACCA exams, and I haven't study for my retakes which is coming in December and it's already October!

OH GOSH I need to wake up.

Other than my diet getting out of control, my bank has been depleting like mad.

I've been shopping online NONSTOP. Can spend up to $600 a month just on online shopping.

Online shoppings + Good food on dates = Bankruptcy.

So I'm quite broke now, I even had to use my savings money!

When I started working, my pay was much lower but I was able to save!

Now, I have to use them even though I earn much more now. What the?

I have been controlling myself these days, not to get impulse buys.

Improved a lot but Philana was saying I shouldn't be buying at all anymore.

Hmmm.... :(

Just hoping my life could get back on track now.

Anyway I've posted random photos. HAHA bye.

TimYee's 21st birthday last year, this was one of my slimmer times :(

Cuzzie birthday!

Darius sitting on my previous workplace's chair! I miss everyone at SABE a lot :(

Scrapbook made by SABE team (led by Felicia LOLOLOL) on my last day of work. And a old SECA bear given by one colleague from the other department, it's an old bear, it was there ever since I was an intern there.

Contents inside made me cried. It was really hard to control and very very emotional. My 2 years there were good, and bad.

Saying goodbye to the workshop where I had my lunch (sometimes), my afternoon naps, my cuts and blood, and many memories I had............. I even dig someone's ears here. It was really full of memories.

My best buddy! Always there for me. Never left me out. Seen me cried my eyeballs out when I was ditched and was there for me every time. Just sitting beside me quietly when I was so down. Saw how pathetic I was that time and just grabbed me and told me "Look at yourself, do you even look human?" LOL. Bring me for good food when we are out for work at hospitals. Make me laugh and just spice up my working life.

Our first date at USS. We were so happy and tired that day. Boyfriend, why you look so Ahbeng? :(

Phil's 23rd birthday (OMG WE ARE SO OLD NOW) at Brussel Sprouts

Yiru's 23rd birthday at Bishan Prawning farm. Those prawns were not ours, it was some uncle who caught a lot and gave to us. And we act like is ours HAHAHA

Boyfriend and I at St James boiler (?) Had free Greygoose Magnum so we went for free drinks.

Even had free fries cause Eve worked there HAHAHA end up paid for cab home only :D

SEE, I'm so much fatter now OH GOSH

Ahwei's 20th birthday at Novena :D Baskin Robbins ice-cream cake!

LOL crying photo at SABE again

Camwhore

Don't want my blog to rot, so I'm adding photos of myself here while in office using their webcam.

WAHAHAH!!!!!

I've been having my braces on for 1 year now. Another 10 more months and it's gonna be gone.

So take more pics with my braces in case I miss them the next time, which most probably wouldn't happen.

Anyway I really wish I could blog again like how I use to in the past. But as we grow older, there's more commitments and time is something that is so precious and difficult to grasp.

Maybe I should really start blogging more, because when I grow older next time I can look back on my posts and remember my life as it was.

Waiting for boyfriend to come pick me from work.

So I'm blogging here!

Okay time to go, need to finish some loose works before I leave office,

blog again.

BYE!

Cherry

Dear Angel....

4.17am now, and I was scrolling through my photo folder and saw our photos.

I miss you very much.

Your laughters, your voice and your smile,

still etched in my heart till today.

Never forgotten,

you will never be forgotten..

x

My Life so far x.

Life's been busy, messy, but great :)

Let's just let the pictures do the talking!

I miss this fat kitty! Her soft purrs and cute little acts. meow!

Random camwhore. Wearing Max Pure Pink lenses from honeycolor.com!

Addicted to all these lenses, just purchased another 3 pairs (Brown, Violet, Blue) on top of my old ones I had (Brown, 2 greys, pink - the one I'm wearing in the above pic)

BAD FOR EYES but I'm so vain!

Cutie Cherryl :)) She IS SOOO ADORABLE! Carol brought her to town to meet us (Me, Xiaobai, Wei) quite some time back. Had alot of fun with her. She's always giggling and making so many funny acts.. But so tiring to take care of a child :( KUDOS TO CAROL! And all the moms in the world!

Tried braiding my hair, kind of failed. Cause of my frizzy hair.. I want to do a rebond but I don't want it to be too flat! Zzzzzz decisions decisions...

I LOVE THIS PHOTO! My bitches watching Noah Yap's video in my room.

It's not about his video that I loved.

Story goes like this:

The night before, I saw some really unpleasant stuff (to me, that is. But it's a good thing for him)about my ex on facebook and I was very heartbroken. I cried my night away. And the very next day, it was a Sunday, and one year ago (I can't say EXACTLY one year ago because it's not THAT accurate). But on that particular Sunday one year ago, was the day he left me a letter through his brother and decided to break up with me (long story, and one which I never want to mention and go through again). I don't know why, when I was walking home after tuition in the morning, my mind just kept having the flashbacks on that day. The time, what I was doing, when I read the letter etc...

So I did some stupid acts, dug the letter and everything he gave me, which I kept in a box, and bawled like a baby on the floor. I know I shouldn't do it cause it's gonna hurt.

BUT I guess I did that because I want to put an end to this whole thing.

An end to the suffering I had for the past one year thinking about us.

Since I believe he's found someone new (I wouldn't say NEW because he once liked the girl alot before we met), and just nice it's been a year and I've been avoiding to face the reality like some retard.

So on that day I just decided that I'll allow myself to cry for him like this for the last time and just get over with it.

Alright, that's not THE point about the photo. LOL

The thing is, after I cried, I twitted cause I needed to vent (seemed like crying is not enough for me)

Just nice on that day, they were watching a movie at town, and I couldn't join because of this STUPIAK reason, so I gave the outing a miss and just slept my afternoon away after mourning for this dead love whahahahaha.

And at night, I was using my lappy when suddenly my dad came in and told me a friend's outside my house.

I'm like (O_O) who could it be!

Ended up I saw them outside my house with my favourite Gongcha and they came to cheer me up :)

I was SO touched! They are always there when I meet bastard guys. They've seen all the ugly side of me- when I cry and after I cry with super ugly swollen eyes.

 I love them so much :D

Met up with C4 at Vivo before heading to Powerhouse with Yiru! We've grown so much :D

12 years of friendship FTW! v(^_^)v

Celebrated Winson's birthday at Planet Paradise. I had abit of hangover (from Powerhouse the night before) still when I went there so I cheated my night away and only drank coke :D

I thought we couldn't finish the bottle but Aaron invited some Thai girls over and WOOHOO!!! Whole bottle gone in 30 minutes.

Throughout the 30 minutes I was outside the pub to avoid having the liquor in my face.

The girls are crazy and Winson was quite gone that night.

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED :D

Me before going to work @ South-Asia. I'm gonna miss wearing teeshirts to work everyday :(

My last day at South-Asia. Loads of pics. Will talk abit more on this!

 My first USS trip! Awesome day. Can I say it's like one of the happiest day as far as I can remember?!
 Had rainbow flowers sent to me at the doorstep (was too rush didn't take proper pic, ended up when I had the time, they wilted already :( !!!!!), breakfast with mommy, took the Transformers Ride (DAMN AWESOME!),
and had the Battlestar Galactica ride 3 times at the Cylon! He almost vomitted, but THANK YOU for still going on the ride with me even though your face turned so green at the 3rd time LOL!
Bought me the Bumble Bee water bottle (Bloody daylight robbery, $28.80 for one bottle WTH, it was impulse buy, really. Because after we took the Transformers ride I was damn high and when I saw the bottle I wanted it straight away :p)
& bought me GINGY!!!!!!!!!!! Always wanted it when I know USS was selling it and finally I got it! :D
After everything, walked back to Vivocity via a super romantic walkway (actually we just don't wanna queue for the tram LOL),
and had a belated Mother's Day dinner with my family.

Went home, bathed and slept straight away. Couldn't stop smiling for the entire day.
I'm a happy girl :)))

Alright, one week of break IS REALLY NOT ENOUGH!
I'm suppose to pack my room but my room's is still as messy as ever.
I planned to study for my exams during this break too, but HAHA fat hope -_-

I'm such a lazy girl.
Tomorrow's the new start of my job. BAHHH no more holidays for me.
Time to work like a cow again.

Alright stop blogging here.
Tired and need to prepare for my new job tomorrow.
Bless me

x.

Labour day love

Met up with Xiaobai and Ahwei for dinner at Ramen Champion @ Iluma!

Been dying to eat the ramen there after I saw the advertisement on train with Shit after school the other day.

I had Sapparo Miso Ramen, too salty, the taste of soup base too strong for my liking, but the noodle and char siew was good! Ahwei had the Bario's ramen and I liked that one so much more! Their noodles are thicker and the meat was soooo good! Had loads of fatty part but it's just so nice :D

They've got so many stalls we didn't even know where to start!

Shall go back more often to try other ramen :D

After dinner we headed down to Bugis Village around 9pm (most shops closing already lol) and I managed to get a navy blue skater skirt and a pair of earrings!

And also the pair of cute hello kitty leopard prints spectacles.

LOL Xiaobai and Ahwei were looking at caps and I saw the specs, thought they were cute so I got it.

Think we got cheated :(

We got them at $10 but after that we saw other shops selling at $6.90 only!

Well, that's what you get at Bugis Street! LOL.

Anyway had an awesome day with them, though was only for a short period of time cause I woke up late and took damn long to get ready.

Suck at drawing eyeliner, I drew the eyeliner and apply my double eyelid glue 3 times!!!!

Think my right eye gonna sag down very soon from all the tugging and pulling.

Had loads of fun and did stupid stuffs LOL. Love them so much :D

Okay time to pack my stuffs, remove my mask and go to sleep.

Long day at work tomorrow and got class also *yawns*

NIGHTS ALL!

Okay I only have 1 reader here I think. HAHA NIGHTS TO YOU!

Photos of myself being vain first.

HAHAHAHA since no one read my blog so I can post many camwhore photos here!