Friday, December 13, 2013

Dear diary....

1 more day to the op.
I am so scared, of so many things..

The loneliness of lying on the operating bed with all the doctors and nurses whom you don't know,
the needles poking into you..
The feeling of being put to deep sleep..
Not knowing if you will wake up from it ever again...
The pain of the stitch, if you wake up.
The results....

I trembled in fear as I typed this post.

Today I took a good look at the sky while in the train and actually treasured the moment to know that I am still well and alive now.
That bright blue sky with the bright white clouds...
Funny huh?
We always tend to cherish things more when we know we might just lose it.

This might be a small operation, this might be not.
I have people telling me "just a small operation"

But I'm just so scared,
of not being to have all I have now again.

Maybe after my operation, when I come back to this post,
I'll just laugh at myself for being such a worrywart.


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